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I'm terrified: Trump supporters call, telling me to go home

caption: Fear that someone might be watching her has kept Morshida Islam out of her garden, where she spends her evenings.
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Fear that someone might be watching her has kept Morshida Islam out of her garden, where she spends her evenings.
Flickr Photo/Shereen M (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0) http://bit.ly/2c2ZxqY

They first called when I was at my son’s open house, and they left me a message.

Hello, Morshida ... On behalf of the Donald Trump Association, I was just calling to see if I can get your support in getting all the foreigners out of the country. And f**k ‘em. F**k the Islamic community too. Nothing to do with your last name – get out of here though. Seriously.

It was two guys. They knew my name. They said it perfectly, like they knew it.

They called me again and they said, “We want to see if we can get some feedback – and get all the foreigners out of this country. What do you think about it?”

I was kind of scared but I said, “I’m sorry, I already don’t like Donald Trump because of what he was saying – on the campaign and on TV. He’s not nice to foreigners. Everyone has equal rights in this country – that’s why people want to come here from all over the world. Because it’s the greatest country.”

And he said the foreigners are taking over, and he wanted to know what I think.

I said, “Well, I think you guys are the same as him, and I hope you never win.”

He said, “What did you say?”

And I said, “You guys are as bad as he is.”

I was really scared. I was shaking.

And they said, “Well, you need to go back, too.”

I said, “What makes you think I need to go back?”

He said, “Well, because you are a foreigner and you’re Muslim, right?”

I said, “Yeah, obviously, you know that I am a Muslim.”

I hung up on them. I didn’t want to continue anymore. I called my daughter. I was crying.

I asked, “Should I change my last name?” You know, I’ve been an American citizen for 27 years.

I was scared that whole night. I didn’t go outside. I usually work around my yard when it’s dark, but I didn’t know if somebody would follow me. Who was it?

Any noise now, I feel paranoid. I heard footsteps, and I was screaming for my boyfriend. Then I called him, and he said, “No, it wasn’t me. I’m at work.”

I have a special needs son – he’s 9 – he doesn’t know right from wrong. I have not said anything to him about it. I watch him when he goes outside. But I don’t feel safe outside. Is somebody watching me, are they going to blow me up? Are they going to shoot me? Are they going to come after me? I mean, I’m not a very big person.

What am I supposed to do? I have lived in this place for a long time. I don’t feel safe anymore. I feel like somebody knows me and somebody is watching me.

I always tell my kids that they need to stand up for themselves and be proud of who they are, know their roots and not let anyone put them down. But now I'm down and I don't know what to do.

I’ll keep a little more private now. Maybe at this point, I will not tell people unless they ask me. I mean, I’m not ashamed to be a Muslim, and if people ask me, I would definitely say that I’m a Muslim.

But all these things are happening – you know, they killed an imam in New York. It’s frightening to be a Muslim.

After 9/11, at the grocery store, people would look at my driver license and go, “Oh, you are a Muslim. You’re an Islam.”

But there has never been anything like this. Since Trump has been running for president, it’s gotten worse.

On the TV, Trump said the first thing he’ll do when he becomes president is to send all of our foreigners back.

If he becomes president, it's going to be a disaster for America. Foreigners work very, very hard here to fulfill their dream. I have no respect for him.

The men said they would call me back next Tuesday. My daughter advised me not to pick up the phone. Just let them leave a message.

I’m not afraid of their phone call. I want to see if they call and what they have to say.

Morshida Islam lives in Lacey, Washington. These comments, edited for clarity, come from an interview with KUOW's Liz Jones and Isolde Raftery.

The Seattle Story Project: First-person reflections published at KUOW.org. To submit a story or note one you've seen that deserves more notice, contact Isolde Raftery at iraftery@kuow.org or 206.616.2035.

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