For better, not worse: How the best marriages work | KUOW News and Information

For better, not worse: How the best marriages work

Mar 2, 2018

Marriage conjures up so many things, but here’s a longish shortlist: union, promise, vow, relationship, interdependence, security, sacrifice, contract, commitment, hard work, choice. Why do people get married? According to a Pew Research Center study, the top three reasons are for love, long-term commitment and companionship.

Given our culture’s relatively high divorce rate (which is actually trending down), would you be surprised to hear that the best marriages today are better than the best ones of previous times? Author Eli J. Finkel makes that argument in his book “The All-or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work.”

Finkel is a professor of social psychology at Northwestern University. He studies “interpersonal attraction, marriage, conflict resolution, and how our social relationships influence our goal achievement.” He was featured on a recent episode of NPR’s Hidden Brain: Why Did Marriage Become So Hard?

This past fall, Finkel visited the Emerald City to read from his book and chat with someone who knows a thing or two about love (and sex), Seattle author and activist Dan Savage. University Book Store presented their talk on September 26 at University Temple United Methodist Church. Sonya Harris recorded the conversation.

Please note: This recording contains unedited language of an adult nature.

Listen to the full version below: