Dan Savage On Marriage
Dan Savage is a sex columnist, author, advocate and more. He is behind the It Gets Better project, an archive of hopeful videos aimed at troubled gay youth, and the author of "The Commitment: Love, Sex, Marriage and My Family." Savage talks to Ross Reynolds about marriage and what he plans to do now that same-sex marriage is legal in Washington state.
From "Never" To "Forever"
Savage and his partner, Terry Miller, will be at Seattle City Hall on Sunday, the first day gay couples can become legally married in Washington state. They were married in British Columbia in 2005 on their 10th anniversary. While Savage says he and Terry are debating whether to renew their vows or get married, he applied for a marriage license at midnight, December 6, so perhaps those vows will be more official on Sunday.
Being out and married is not an option Savage thought he’d ever have. "To come out meant to really walk away from marriage and family. What you were telling your parents when you came out as gay was that you would never marry, that you would never have children."
Not being able to marry was a hard truth to overcome.
"I had slit that throat and buried that body by the side of the road when I was 16 years old and started coming out to my family. And then here I am all these many years later and here comes this Walking Dead marriage zombie saying, 'I’m back, this is possible for you.'"
Savage hopes that as gay marriage becomes legal across the country, gays and lesbians won’t grow up forsaking marriage or facing scary marriage zombies. "A lot of us reacted negatively to marriage because we had been rejected by marriage and family, so we preemptively rejected it and had to reassess our feelings about it as marriage became possible for same sex couples."
Savage talks more on monogamy and marriage in his interview with Ross Reynolds, plus hear why he thinks, "Men are pigs, but monogamy is unnatural."
Dan Savage and his partner, Terry Miller, tell their story for It Gets Better